How often do we think or say…”geez, I just don’t have enough time in the day!” I’ve really been paying close attention to what I say and what I hear from others. It seems we try harder to do more, rush through our day, skid into our deadlines and appointments, and wind up feel emotionally frantic and mentally fractured.
We want and need more peace in our day (and in our world), yet it feels as though we spinning farther away from peace all the time. I know there are always essential things we need to do, but what about all the other stuff we cram our lives with?
There is one powerful tool each of us has which can dramatically change our life. A simple word–that word—NO.
No, I can’t help you on this right now.
No, that doesn’t work for me at this time.
No, I don’t have the time.
Oh, this is so hard for me, and for most of us for many reasons, beliefs, insecurities, people-pleasing, etc.
Here are a few ideas to help you with this.
1. Practice several times a day until it becomes comfortable and easy to say to anyone. Don’t offer any excuses, long explanations, or justifications. Simply “no”. For most women, it seems to be an ingrained habit for us to react with a yes, so create a new habit and respond thoughtfully with a “no”.
2. For every “no” you say to someone else, you are saying “yes” to yourself! More time, more energy, and more resources will be available each day to put towards the things that really matter to you.
3. If you need to, take a breath, a moment (or overnight) before you respond. In this moment, feel the question and your gut-response in your body. What do you really want to do? If you aren’t sure, do NOT say “yes”, until you are sure. This really helps me to identify what “I want to do” before I answer. Your body isn’t lying on this, trust it.
The joy of “no” is that every “yes” will be sincere, aligned with what you want and need in your life. You’ll start to clear out less important stuff, activities and people. You will also experience less resentment towards the situation, fewer regrets, and less frustration with yourself which you bring into situations when you didn’t say “no”.